AI: They all go home except David

I seriously can’t remember but 3 contestant names.  The girls suck and so do most of the guys.  So the 2 guys going home are last name Yeager & the guy that reminds me of Luke Perry.  Amanda Overmeyer must go.  She sounds like she smokes 10 packs a day. 

AI: The men, boys & gays take the stage

I love how they dumped the idea of finding a pure, undiscovered talent for “as long as they don’t have a current contract”.  Bucky was some sort of opening act for Britney & Jason Castro had something to do with that MTV Cheyenne chick.  Speaking of Castro, isn’t he just the most darling thing ever?  His performance tonight was all fucking sunshine & lollipops.  My guess is he drops out within 2 weeks for his own reality show/record deal.   Danny Norigaya was the best.  He sounds so non-gay when he sings.  Also amazing how much he has changed from last season!  Boy got himself some Proactive & a new do.  He is working it!

I don’t need my husband. Is that so wrong?

My feeling is I don’t *need” my husband, I *want* him.  To me, that would seem to be a compliment but he says it’s mean.  He NEEDS me.  He would never find anything & would forget to eat if it weren’t for me.  All of the tasks I rely on my spouse to do, I can either a) do myself or b) hire someone to do it.  It is slightly different now that we have a child but still…. I am going on an entire day without spousey around.  He is out of town until Friday (work).  I am managing just fine & have managed just fine without him on other occasions.  I will even dare say that I function better without him.  My house hasn’t been cluttered up, my sink remains dish free, the 2 year old was fed on time (and had a meal that contained vegetables-which he ate!), the t.v has remained off, I made jello, took out the garbage & have even managed a few minutes to sit down and write this!  I also worked a full day. 

My house is more chaotic with him around but I wouldn’t want it any other way.  I don’t need him to mow the yard, fix my car, take out the garbage or even bring home a paycheck but I do want him here.  To me, it’s a true test to be able to function just as well if not better without him but still miss him terribly when he’s gone.  I’ve never liked the question “what is it you love about your spouse?” and the played out responses like “he makes me laugh”.  To me, it’s more real not being able to put my finger on the exact reason why I miss him so much when he’s gone. 

I guess you could say that I in a way, I do *need* him because  there is that *something* missing without him around.

Christina Aguilera finally covers the girls

I am so sick of seeing Christina’s post delivery rack.  Yes, they are gigantuan & I am jealous but there is just something not sexy about milk filled mom boobs.  Those things look like they could pop at any minute & spew max’s sustinence like a rogue garden hose.  So relieved was I when I saw this cover.  Someone also needs to fill Christina in on a little breastfeeding mom issue called Mastitis.  You really want to get a sensible nursing bra that covers the entire breast tissue.  Underwire is ok as long as it’s not pinching milk ducts.  She is asking for trouble squeezing those puppies into something from the Fredericks Extreme Cleavage Collection.  I’m just a concerned mom who has been there.  Someone, please pass it along to her.  Thanks

AI: Final 24 - no real surprises, well, maybe 1

I didn’t agree with who made it to the final 50-ish but I sure as shit agreed with the final 24.  THANK GOD that dork Kyle Ensley didn’t make it.  I didn’t see the attraction there.  Josiah Leming seemed to be the golden boy of the competition thus far but he got the ax too (thankfully).  I never liked him.  I thought his voice was strange & the whole accent thing odd.  Good riddance & don’t let the door hit you in the ass!  The final 24 can sing so the competition should be interesting.  I think the men are far more interesting than the ladies too! I like Eddie Munster (AKA David Archuleta) & Jessica Alba (AKA Danny Noriega).

The Grammy’s Confuse Me

Does anyone sing by themselves any more? Fergie & John Legend, Beyonce & Tina Turner, Carrie Underwood & her weave, Kanye & the chip on his shoulder.  One or two is cool but every performance? I’m sure the poor intern that thought it up never imagined it would get so wildly out of control. Do they sit in their planning meeting & discuss what ackward pairings they can make this year? Do you think Rihanna even knew who Morris Day was before this show? She was still in diapers when he was proclaiming “Do you know what time it is??!!!” Not like you couldn’t detect on her face or in her performance her lack of enthusiasm to be performing with him. I’m sure she was thinking “I could be performing with Tina Turner too if I were screwing JayZ. I will get you Beyonce!!!” (on a side note, who did Alicia Keys screw to get to perform twice?).

The entire show confused me. From Carrie Underwood’s S&M meets Stomp version of “Before He Cheats” to the down right creepy & disturbing Cirque De Soweird Beatles tribute show excerpt. When I didn’t feel like slitting my wrists, I felt like I was at the Tony Awards. There were so many over the top performances. I can definitely see Beyonce & Tina’s performance headlining Vegas next year. It was so cabaret that I half expected their drag queen counterparts to join them on stage (or maybe they were the drag versions performing???).

Best Piano Bar Performance goes to: Fergie & John Legend

Best Cougar Performance: Whoever performed with Kid Rock

Best outperforming performance in a performance: Alicia Keys out singing John Mayer (couldn’t even hear the poor guy)

Best chance of landing a Superbowl halftime show in 20 years: Foo Fighters

Best performance by a jilted Grammy host: Jason Bateman

I thoroughly enjoyed Kanye West’s performances. I also thought Amy Winehouse did well all things considered. I was half expecting her to pull a Britney & perform all drugged up, curse & flip us all off via satellite.